When we’re old and gold and grey,
Do we want to look back and say,
Well hey! We never said the words,
We heard the others shout when they,
Were mad or sad or even glad,
That they survived another day,
Do we want to waste our time,
Writing rhymes we’ve heard before?
Or do we want to bend the rules,
Make something new, gramat-explore?
Counter-point: do we really
Want to be known as vulgar whores?
As those who could not find new words
So they used the dirty slang of bores?
Well no, we don’t want that at all!
Perhaps there exists a middle ground,
Where f-bombs are dropped with subtle grace,
But used sparsely so they know their place,
And are never used to someone’s face,
And nor, for that matter, behind someone’s back,
Because if we really want to attack,
We should use nerf guns, after all,
Because damn those things are fun!
So: While sugar and spice are oh so nice,
Like nerf guns, sometimes swears are fun,
And once in awhile they can be used,
But if dropped too often and abused,
They become just another doofy tool,
For assholes to go around sounding cool,
(See? Didn’t that last line sound effing dumb?).
Yes, words are oh so oh so fun,
Let’s mix them up but don’t be dumb,
Don’t be vulgar, swear with grace,
Because sometimes you have a shitty day,
And you just want to call it like it is.